By DCB Editorial, October 31, 2024
Alrighty… China’s cranking out cheap electric cars faster than you can say ‘plug-in hybrid’—and guess what? They’re actually decent. They’re knocking out these EVs at a price that’d make a BMW exec cry into their overpriced leather seats, and no, it’s not because they’re pulling in slaves from Yejembojembo Land. No, they’re using their own people! They’re paying ‘em, too! Like… decent actual wages. Turns out the ‘communism with whips and chains’ thing isn’t really in style anymore. China’s flipped the script; it’s capitalistic communism now, baby! Investing in the future, making their cities shine while the so-called ‘civilized’ world over here in the West is letting the infrastructure rot and still thinks its crumbling cathedrals are the pinnacle of achievement.
And then there’s Europe, looking at China like it’s some big bad dictatorship. I say Europe’s a dictato-shit. Just look at how much tax money they’re shoveling into Ukraine, all to give Russia a good spanking. For what? So the vultures at Blackrock can swoop in and pick through the carcass. War’s expensive, folks; it’s the ultimate public works project with one hell of a toll on the budget. And if you need a sign of how bad things are getting in Europe, they’re about to roll out the Renault Twingo EV hatch.
Yeah, a budget-friendly tin can of an electric hatch for under twenty grand. They think it’s some miracle of the people’s car, affordable electric wheels for the masses. But let me tell you something: I’ve seen this before. This is European history 101—‘the enigmatic hatch, the promise of cheap motoring.’ And then the motoring press falls all over themselves, pretending this thing has any kind of soul or dignity, all because the ads contracts are gonna roll in faster than the car itself can go.
I’ll tell you right now, the Twingo EV will win some ‘Car of the Year’ award. Oh yeah, mark my words. Because these car awards are run by judges whose only qualifications are self-importance, ego, and desperation to be relevant for one day a year. They’ll sit there pretending they’re gatekeepers of culture while voting for the glorified toaster on wheels. Why? Because it’s what the advertisers want. It’s all about selling this so-called lifestyle of cheap, practical motoring. Meanwhile, Europe’s teetering, folks. It’s trying to relive some glorious past.
China’s out there lighting up sparkling new cityscapes like Blade Runner meets Vegas, while Europe’s putting lipstick on a stone. Back in the day, yeah, Europe had the Renaissance, the Enlightenment, those pointy cathedrals. But look around now, they’re hawking cheap cars like the Twingo as if it’s some cultural moment. The East is rising, and Europe’s propping itself up on yesterday’s glory. If the Twingo EV is the pinnacle of European civilisation, then welcome to the new Dark Age, folks!
